The pixel art glitched. For a split second, the map of Aethelburg was replaced by a satellite view of Earth. Real countries. Real borders. And a new metric appeared at the top of the screen, just for a moment, before the game overwrote it:
A single executable icon appeared on my desktop: a crudely drawn globe, tilted at a jaunty angle, wearing a tiny dunce cap. The file name read simply Dummynation.exe .
Then the cursor blinked again.
I didn't delete it.
I clicked it.
I played for an hour. Aethelburg’s rivers ran dry because I’d chosen to subsidize bottled water for the elite. Its crops failed because I’d renamed the Department of Agriculture to the Department of Patriotic Slogans. The neighboring countries—once neutral—were now "hostile" because my foreign policy consisted solely of calling their ambassadors "nerds."
Then the game did something strange.
By hour two, Aethelburg had no hospitals, no schools, no power grid. But it did have forty-seven statues of me, a state-sponsored conspiracy theory about psychic frogs, and a STUPIDITY INDEX of 98.
